Growing up in the world of Disney and Jane Austen, I had this dream. This ideal that once it would become true, I knew I could finally be happy. Like most girls do, this fantasy of finding prince charming is undeniably relevant to my not so princess self. Oh, prince charming. The handsome man that would fill the empty corners of my heart and make it better. You see, this man was going to love me. He was going to admire all the little characteristics about me that the rest of the world couldn’t care less about. He was going to make me laugh, inspire me to be a better person, and line my life with love.
It would be like a movie. Me – the quirky spanish girl who was challening and intriguing. Him – the struggling musician who was looking for a sign to keep pursuing his dreams. In each other, we would find what we didn’t know we were searching for. Late at night, I would fall asleep dreaming about him. Always thinking of what he will be like and how much life would change once we found each other.
As the years went by, I became that girl you know that is inevitably single. I mean incessantly single. Some say it’s like a curse, but to me it has been a blessing. These years have been a bridge into a life that I never knew I was destined for. Over time, I have grown to feel beautiful, special, and valuable on my own. This time has been accounted by my friendships, traveling, service in the community, involvement with creative projects, and the pursuit of my dreams.
What about my love life? I have one. Not with a man, but with myself and this world. I have found love in the smile I see form on the faces of the little kids I work with. Love in the laughter and craziness of my family. While furthering my education to achieve my dreams, I have found love in the work I put in that gets me closer to my goals. In building the friendships I have, I’ve found that there is an abundance of love and acceptance that never ceases to make my heart burst. When I travel to a new city, glimpse upon the majesties of the colors of this world, there I feel love. It is all around me and in places I would have never conceived.
Somewhere along the way, I stopped waiting for him. Prince charming was no longer a destination, but a tired fantasy. The idea that I need him to be me no longer exists. Now at night my dream has changed, in it I have found me with a weighty smile and am running through a field of white clean daisies. Twirling, dancing, and chasing the light at the end of the land. Time stands still and I discover I am completely alone. This is different from all my other dreams. I begin to note that I can’t see him anymore. The tall handsome man that used to carry me was gone and I realize that I found it.
I found me without him.
Just because you don’t have a prince, doesn’t mean you aren’t a princess. – Zayn Malik
In a world, where they tell you that as a woman you aren’t as valuable if you aren’t with a man, they are wrong. As a woman, you are powerful and posess the ability to change this world. As a woman without a man, you are equally just as beautiful and worthy. You don’t have to wait for him to answer all your prayers.
You can find beauty, happiness, and yes even love. These emotions aren’t just reserved for a romantic relationship, but for all you put your heart into.
Once you realize that, you can find “it” too.